SamTravelling solo almost inevitably involves interacting with strangers. Whether it be in a crowded airport or a busy hostel, you’ll likely wind up dealing with new people. Though this may not be an issue for everyone, it can feel really overwhelming for someone with social anxiety. These situations can be especially stressful for travellers within the queer community.
My first time travelling on my own I let my anxiety scare me away from enjoying my trip to the fullest. Though I still managed to have an amazing experience, there were days when I barely left the hostel. I felt paralysed in the middle of a big city without any familiar faces. I didn’t speak the native language, and felt embarrassed when trying to communicate with anyone. In my mind, it seemed as if being an outsider meant that I’d stick out like a sore thumb. If any of these feelings sound familiar to you, I’m here to let you know this is a perfectly normal experience for a first time traveller.
That trip was many years ago now, but occasionally I still have to remind myself that even though my feelings are valid, my fears are not always based in fact. Anxiety is a reflex meant to protect us from danger, but that doesn’t always mean that it’s accurate. As a queer woman, I find I feel the need to keep my guard up more than some other travellers might. However, I have the bittersweet privilege of not being immediately perceived as queer by the outside world. People who are apart of the LGBTQ+ community who are visibly queer may feel more anxiety surrounding their safety. People travelling with a partner of the same gender can also feel anxiety regarding how they might be treated while travelling to a new place. Even in countries where it’s legal to be in a queer relationship, there’s never a guarantee that you’re safe from discrimination.
The reason I’m writing this article is to remind you that, though sometimes social anxiety is valid, it should never stop you from travelling. This world belongs to you just as much as it belongs to anyone else, and you have every right to explore it. As long as you show respect to other cultures and environments, nothing should stand in the way of your dreams of travelling.
One of the ways I cope with social anxiety while travelling is by reminding myself to focus on the big picture. All the small moments will pass, the crowded lines or awkward airport checkins are just small blips in the amazing trip I’m about to have. In the eyes of airline and tourism employees, I’m just one of many. There’s likely no issue I can bring up that they haven’t already dealt with at some point in their career. It’s also apart of their job to be respectful towards everyone, no matter their appearance or orientation. If I do find myself dealing with discrimination, then I have every right to either stand up for myself, or remove myself from the situation and find a way to deal with it when I’m in a safer space. Whatever happens, I am the only one who has the power to decide whether or not I am going to get to enjoy my trip.
Of course, if you suffer from severe anxiety, there may be a chance that you need help from a professional before you’re ready for solo travel, but that doesn’t mean that you won’t ever be ready. Anxiety should never stop you from seeing all the places you dream to see. If you feel ready to travel on your own, but are worried your nerves might get the better of you, here are some tips that might help you cope. When you’re having trouble staying focused on the big picture, try writing down reminders or affirmations to help you stay excited about your trip. If you’re a visual person, you can try to conjure a picture in your head of the sites you’re most looking forward to seeing, and imagine yourself there when dealing with moments of stress. You can also have someone you love write a motivational note for you to take on your travels to help you stay positive.
Although these tips may not work for everyone, I hope this article at least made you feel hopeful and enthusiastic about travelling. May all your adventures be thrilling and beautiful.
